Actually Happy

     Tonight I was really, truly, able to feel it happy. I saw the show Next to Normal at the Wood Theater in Glens Falls, NY. I've seen the show twice on Broadway. Once with Jessica Phillips and once with Alice Ripley. I loved both. I love this show. I love the music. Everything about it is so beautiful to me. I find myself relating to the topic despite not being mentally ill or having anyone close to me be mentally ill. I don't know what it is, I just love the story.
     I went with my friend Maddie and my sister. We had originally had plans to see the show while it was still on Broadway. That never happened though. We never saw it together. Tonight was Maddie's first time seeing it. I was excited to see it, but also a little eh. Essentially I had my reservations. But as we were sitting in our seats staring at the stage and waiting for the show to start, I realized how happy I was to be in that place, in that time.
     This never happens to me. I go through life relatively content, but not really blindingly happy. Tonight I was that happy, and I haven't felt that way in a long time. Getting $10 tickets and seeing a show I love with people I love was amazing. Being in a city no matter how small also didn't hurt. The cast was great, which definitely helped. It was a great feeling. But I know I couldn't handle being that happy all the time. I would go crazy. I was losing my mind. But now I know what it is. The feeling of tonight verses how I've been feeling lately were polar opposites. I need to have more moments like that. So for tonight I'm going to revel in my blinding, crazy happiness.

Waiting for the show to start in the park.